Something about me and why I love to cook.

Every since I can remember I have always loved to be in the kitchen. I grew up in a bit of a chaotic home to say the least. Even so, as much as I can remember the dysfunction I also remember some of the better times.
I remember big parties with family and friends and my mom cooking enough to feed an army. I remember coming home from school on maybe just one occasion to my mom in the kitchen baking peanut butter cookies and me thinking to myself, that one day I would have a family and make them wonderful things and that my kids would almost expect that they could come home to the house smelling wonderful to find some kind of tasty after school treat. Most times however I came home to an un kept home and a pile of dirty dishes in the sink and a Mother who was just so lost in this world that she could hardly cope. My Father would come home after working a full day at the ship yard and go straight to work trying to clean up some dishes so that he could make dinner, his cooking skills consisted of a few horrible meals that to this day I believe is the reason I learned to cook. He did however give it his all with his pan fried chicken breasts with no skin but dry oh so dry, or a fried pork chop, then we would have mashed potatoes they were a bit of a rough mash and either a can of corn or green beans and a slice of cheap wheat bread with butter except it was not butter it was parkay. So I quickly learned to ask friends if I could eat at their home.
My earliest memory of eating at someone else's home was my child hood friend Melissa Cleantis, her Mother was the Mother I said I wanted to be someday and wished for on a daily basis. She kept a beautiful home, she had her own garden, she was always up and dressed, she not only made dinner for her family but she also made sure that they had breakfast and lunch not to mention the fact that she baked! I look back and have to laugh at what a pest I was! I ALWAYS wanted to be in her kitchen while she was cooking and I would ask so many questions. To this day I have such fond memories of the kindness that the Cleantis family showed me.
Then there was our next door neighbors Hal & Jennie, there kids were raised and out of the home. I would find any excuse to go over on a Saturday morning, most times while my parents were still asleep. She would be standing in the kitchen either making waffles or pancakes. The only waffle I had ever had was frozen, I had no idea someone could just make these things! Looking back now its funny that there was always an extra place at the table.
Sadly my Mother, Alice passed away in an auto accident when I was 11. My Father, Dennis stepped up to the plate as always and tried to make the best home he could for myself, my sister and my twin brothers. He had his hands full to say the least. His sister my Aunt Sandy, would come over on the weekends and help him cook meals that he could freeze and heat. I remember being under her feet one day when she asked me if I would like to peel potatoes? I was more then happy to help and that began my quest to cook. Standing there side by side with my wonderful, kind, soft spoken Aunt who was willing to let me help her in the kitchen.
From there I wanted to help my dad with what ever I could do, I would wash the dishes, peel potatoes and stir what ever needed stirring.
Aunt Sandy could not make it every weekend and this would leave a feeling of doom in my stomach for the coming week. One thing my dad would cook was corned beef hash, from a can. Seriously!!! The problem was he would barely heat it and call it ready. He would have us sit at the table and finish our food and of course it was not hard for him to figure out that I would put my food in a napkin and throw it away. So I learned a new trick once he left the table I would sneak back to the pot and put my food back in it and... yes, I got caught doing that as well.
One morning I asked my dad what he was making for dinner that night, and he said "it had been a long week so he we were having HASH!!" So not the thing to tell your kid right before she leaves for school. Once I was at school I started crying. Out of concern they sent me to the office to talk to the Principal, I told the Principal "that my dad does not have time to cook and he feeds us dog food!" After all it looked like dog food and smelled like dog food. At the end of the day they have my dad come in and talk to the Principal, so he had to take time off work, and get over to the school to have the Principal looking at him like (You poor man with 4 kids whose crazy wife died) and her asking him if there were problems at home and him saying "No, aside from their mother passing away a few months ago, he feels things are progressing well" She said " I'm happy to hear that, but it is not okay to feed your children dog food" Oh MAN was I in trouble!
So from that day on I helped with even more in the kitchen, and I would make a list for my dad to take to  the store. Things were going along just great until Thanksgiving.
When my Mom was alive we either hosted Thanksgiving or went to someones home.The first Thanksgiving without my Mom I did not give it much thought but assumed we would be going somewhere.As the day went on I asked my Dad "where are we going?" He said "Denny's"...I thought not exactly what we usually do but oh well, and yes OH WELL, joke was on me. My dad's name being Dennis and going by Denny was his out! By the time it was getting dark outside I said "are we going to Denny's?" He said "we are at Denny's and I'm just about to make grilled cheese and soup"...this of course meant grilled cheese with American cheese and soup from a can! UGH!
So that Christmas I made my first turkey and YES I left the bag of turkey parts inside the turkey AND that was the worst turkey I ever made but it has NEVER been that bad again.
This was also the time when I wanted cookbooks and I have had a love of cookbooks ever since.
To this day I can now eat chicken breast again however, I leave the skin on and drizzle with olive oil, salt and pepper and place in a preheated 375 degree oven for 45-55 mins...perfect every time!
I'm not big on canned veggies and we don't do potatoes every night and hardly ever mashed but if they are mashed they are mashed to a perfect consistency and I use real butter NOT parkay! I make my own soups because they are so very easy to make and so much better for you homemade. I DO NOT buy American cheese! It is not cheese it is plastic that melts!! I know this might offend some but I'm sorry, you must face the truth as hard as it may be.
The best part for me is when I look back is I can remember the good times,  and that my Mom was just a person that was lost in this world but she did love her family to the extent that she was loved or understood love. I can close my eyes and see me walking in the door of our little home in San Pedro with the green shag carpet and I can hear her in the kitchen and I can smell those peanut butter cookies.") I'm thankful for the the time I had with her and I'm sure I will see her in Heaven someday!